Posts tagged: glee
The Glee fandom.
I’m pretty excited for this. I love LSOH, JGL and Roberto wrote The First Time and On My Way.
2x07 - “Trust me, Mercedes, love is just around the corner.”
3x13 - “See, Puckerman, that’s what you’re missing out on: True Love.”
No video editing, because FUCK THA POLICE.
Bringing this back, before I log off to get ready for the theater.
No video editing, because FUCK THA POLICE.
I WAS JUST GIFING SHIT AND THEN I NOTICED THIS GIRL WALKING IN FRONT OF PUCK AND QUINN
WHY IS SHE BALANCING HER BOOKS ON HER HEAD
WHY DOES SHE THINK THAT THE NORMAL WAY TO WALK DOWN A HIGH SCHOOL HALLWAYS IS TO BALANCE YOUR BOOKS ARE YOUR HEAD
WATER YOU DOING
That’s how I walk down school hallways.
THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED FOR MY LIFE.
When I was younger, I was pressured into being someone I wasn’t. I was pressured by myself, because of peer pressure and the overwhelming urge to fit in; to be normal. I knew I wasn’t normal but I didn’t know why. I would people watch, and I would write myself internal scripts; I started teaching myself how to act like my classmates. I started teaching myself how to act like my classmates when I was still in early grade school.
I am Autistic, a fact that I didn’t know until I was 18. It wasn’t until I was diagnosed that I was able to relax and, for the first time, believe I was normal, that there wasn’t anything wrong with me; I was able to be me. Until then, I just thought I was a freak for how I comprehend things and how I act. A “mask” was the safest route to take.
I’m now twenty years old, and have had many years to perfect said mask. I’m damn good at acting normal, and I’ve been told so by a number of professionals including my Psychiatrist. So good, in fact, that I’ve been told I’d make a great actor as I can take on any persona depending on the situation, if need be.
But it wasn’t easy. It was never easy, and it never will be. The pressure associated with keeping the act up at school caused an unconscious and internal imbalanced that resulted in daily meltdowns at home. I would slam doors and kick and stomp until my legs ached. I would throw things and break things and scream until I lost my voice. I would pull my hair and bite myself and claw my arms until I bled. And I would beat up my sister with tooth and nail (literally), until she bled, too. I would go after my mother until she was backed into a corner, curled up in a form of self-defense. An 8 year old girl had her mother cornered on a regular basis.
Because of the pressure of acting normal.
It’s one of the reasons why Glee, and especially Dave Karofsky, hit so close to home. Everyone bags on Dave. People say he’s a horrible person because he was a bully. They say he’s not worthy of happiness; he doesn’t deserve forgiveness. Some people even go so far as to say his suicide attempt was karma; that he should have died because he bullied Kurt and kissed him when he hit his boiling point.
What those people don’t realize is that there are people out there who are like Dave. There are people who may not be exactly like Dave, ie: a former closeted bully turned victim (because that’s what he is - he’s a victim of homophobia and bullying), but they may have enough similarities for them to relate to Dave.
Do you know how heartbreaking it is when the character you relate to is under attack? When people are saying the character should die because of the exact same reasons you relate to him?
Some people say Dave should have died because of his past; that it was karma. Does that mean I should attempt suicide as a form of karma because of what I’ve done in my past? I take it personally because it is personal.
Refusing to forgive Dave is hypocritical to how the rest of the characters have been treated. Dave can’t be happy or forgiven because he was a bully. Does that mean Quinn shouldn’t be respected because she had a baby at 16? Does that mean Puck shouldn’t be trusted because he got her pregnant, and later got thrown into Juvie? Does that mean Santana shouldn’t be allowed to sing in the New Directions because she was originally sent to destroy the club? Does that mean Rachel, Quinn, and Mercedes don’t deserve to be in a happy relationship because they’ve all cheated? Does that mean Finn shouldn’t be forgiven for how he treated Kurt when he had a crush on him? Does that mean Blaine shouldn’t be trusted because of how he forced himself onto Kurt?
If the suicide attempt was Dave’s form of karma, was the car crash Quinn’s form of karma?
I feel that Kurt showed a lot of maturity by forgiving Dave. He was able to look beyond their past, and move on towards a better future. You can’t change the past, but it’s called the past for a reason; maturity is moving beyond the mistakes people have made in order to focus on the now, because without a now there is no future.
And Dave almost didn’t get a chance at a future.
This part was so short but so painful to watch. No parent should have to find their child like that.
Be careful what you wish for.